What Should You Do If The Manager is a Poor Listener?

One of the essential skills for any manager is listening. Listening shows respect, concern, openness, empathy, curiosity, trust, and receptivity to feedback. Good listening ability is considered to be a quality of an effective leader.

Listening isn't that hard. But many managers are bad at listening. It's a management disease and even has a name: Poor Listener Syndrome (PLS)! Many people say listening is an important management skill. But why do so many employees say that their managers are poor listeners?

Here are the seven most frequent reasons why managers are bad listeners, along with a solution for each issue:

1. It's a blind spot for managers. A behavioural blind spot is a gap between our intentions and our behaviours. Most managers see themselves as good listeners. Since candid feedback is a rare thing nowadays, many people are not aware of their flaws until someone points them out. Though even when they are, most people still deny the problem exist.

The solution: The manager needs some feedback. Feedback is a gift, and awareness is the key to self-development.

There are managers that aren't aware that they have listening issues.

2. They don't understand the importance of listening. These managers also face this issue in their personal lives, with their friends and family, and poor listening is often the problem.

The solution: The manager needs to learn about the importance of listening and experience positive effects when they focus on improving their listening skills!

3. They don't know how to listen. Managers are not good at listening but think they understand the importance of listening and that they DO listen. Though this may be true, others see behaviours that show a lack of listening.

The solution: Listening skills are easy behaviours to learn; all it takes is a little awareness and practice. These habits include:

• Making eye contact
• Head nodding
• An open posture/body language
• Leaning forward towards the speaker
• Arms uncrossed
• Utilising encouraging phrases such as "go on", "tell me more", "I see", or anything to show that they are paying attention
• Paraphrasing (repeating back in one's own words to confirm their understanding

These managers will need to take a short course, read a book, observe others, practice, and get feedback. Just like any new skill, it feels strange at first, but with practice, it will become a habit.

4. They are impatient or easily distracted. These might be separate issues, but sometimes they have related causes. Even smart managers usually find it hard to slow down and take more time to listen. 

They skip ahead and want to finish someone's sentence, use hand gestures to rush someone along, or their minds start thinking about other matters. Smartphone-checking is one of the symptoms of this impatience and habitual multi-tasking.

The solution: The manager must shut off all the distractions (for instance, put down their phone), start to focus and give the person in front of them 100% of their attention. There will be a noticeable difference from others' response. 

It's crucial for managers to be able to listen. 

5. The manager only listen to what they want. The manager has no problem listening to their superiors but somehow does not listen to their peers or direct reports.

The solution: The manager must be told to listen to their peers as it is just as important as listening to their superiors. They just need to apply this skill consistently and equally.

6. They don't care about their employees at all. Managers won't say this, but when they try to justify their poor listening skills, it becomes clear that they don't see the point of paying attention to what others have to say. They may not be interested in people. In the worst cases, they are arrogant.

The solution: Fake it until you make it. If a manager can be convinced that it is in their selfish self-interest to at least pretend that they are listening, they might be willing to copy listening behaviours. Yes, it's not authentic, and some people will see through it, but sometimes if someone practices a behaviour long enough, they will get good at it, and they will start to make it a habit.

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Source: Great Leadership

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